When you're diagnosed with cancer, the first emotion is denial. I went into the "NO, NOT ME" mode the very instant the words Granulosa Cell Tumor came out of my doctor's mouth. I've felt like a million dollars with bountiful energy the last few years. I eat really well, lots of fresh fruits, nuts, salads, and veggies with virtually no bread and limited red meat. The girls I work with always tease me about my healthy lunches. I don't even keep cookies or candy in the house. In this world of overweight Americans, I weigh only about 6 pounds more than I did when I was 21. I saw my mom's gynecological oncologist for my yearly check-ups for years after she did my mom's cancer surgery, all the way up to her retirement in early 2011. The only area that I struggle with is my stress level. I tend to internalize my feelings. I hold them in where they fester. When people make decisions that I don't like or approve of, I don't speak up and say how I feel. This is the area I intend to work hard on. Now don't get me wrong, I intend to continue to document all of my fun home improvement projects on this blog so don't feel that you have to run for the hills. Ha
I finally got in to see the gynecological oncologist last week. He is the only one in our metropolitan area since my mom's doctor retired. His office was packed with women when we arrived and it didn't appear that he had even taken a cursory glance at my file. He said we needed CT scans of my chest, abdomen, and pelvis and I had to remind him that they had already been done. He looked on his computer and said he didn't see them and asked me what they showed. I had to tell HIM that they were all clear. Things went downhill from there. He was extremely noncommittal and kept saying "whatever you decide." He gave me three treatment options: 1. Watch and wait with blood work and CT scans every 3 months, 2. Have a second look surgery in order to stage the cancer, or 3. Assume that cancer cells remained behind and begin chemotherapy. I said that I'd read study after study that concluded that chemotherapy doesn't work well for my type of slow growing cancer and he agreed that was true. My sister asked which option he'd pursue if it were his wife and he said probably a second look surgery. I asked if he felt my cancer was related to my mom's and how this might impact my daughter and sisters and he said he felt it was a fluke and totally unrelated since my mom's ovarian cancer was the epithelial type, not a sex chord tumor. He presented my case before the tumor board on Friday and called late Friday to say they had the same recommendations except they added obtain a second opinion. I have an appointment at MD Anderson Cancer Center in Houston, Texas for August 14. I WILL remain positive. I WILL remind myself that this cancer can remain in remission for 20 or 30 years before it returns. And I will live my life!
~exterior house & garden tour~
8 hours ago